A comment posted on my blog today struck a chord with me. Someone expressing frustration and hurt over the fact that I do not take a more personalized approach to my blog and make more of an effort to connect and acknowledge all my supporters.
But how the heck do you do that??
From the get-go I have struggled with how to express my gratitude to the family, friends, and strangers that are supporting me in this journey. I’ve even blogged about this before. Spoken to my aunt about it. Sent thank you cards. Wrote emails. But I am realizing it is virtually impossible to personally connect with each and every person.
The reality is that every day is a juggling act… From the time Miss M wakes me in the morning to the time I tuck her into bed at night, my day is full. When I’m not being an actively engaged mom to a needy toddler (which takes up most of my time), I’m getting the laundry done, or making dinner, or running a household… And when I’m not doing all that I’m going in for chemo or Herceptin or getting scans, blood work, or genetic testing… Then of course I have to squeeze in the daily exercise, juicing, meditation, and healthy eating (which means non-stop cooking because eating healthy doesn’t come in a box that I can just throw in the microwave or oven)… And still find time for my hubby, friends, family and – oh yeah, this blog!
I wish I had the time to personally reach out to every single person that has sent a card, wrote a beautiful sentiment on my blog, emailed encouraging words, or donated something to help me in my fight against cancer. I truly do. I read everyone’s comments on my blog with excitement and interest. I LOVE hearing your thoughts, inspiring stories, suggestions, and well wishes. The Graceful Woman Warrior committee in Massachusetts continues to forward me the cards that come in full of love and prayers and positivity – And I keep a rotation of them tacked up to the wall or on the fridge for a boost when I need one. There are also a handful of folks that have consistently gone out of their way to offer BIG support in ways I never even imagined.
I never saw this coming. Any of it. I’m still trying to wrap my brain around the enormity of facing stage 4 metastatic cancer at age 37 with a 2 year old daughter and my whole life ahead of me. Still trying to process the amazing and never ending flow of support and love that just keeps streaming in. Still trying to understand what this means. How being in treatment for the rest of my life changes things.
So just know that amidst the craziness of my life I still love and look forward to forging connections with as many of you as possible. Because those of you who truly know me, know that forging connections is one of my favorite things to do. I’m a social worker, remember?? It’s all about the relationships.
But if the thank you card doesn’t arrive in a timely fashion, don’t take it personally. I still love you.
Peace. – T