Trust Your Instincts

Paying homage to my hair and my beautiful new scarf from Auntie Cole

Second chemo session today.  So far so good.

Any day now my hair will start falling out.  I’m actually not feeling too emotional about it.  I know one day it’ll grow back again – And from what I hear it grows back thicker and more beautiful than ever before.  Hell yeah!

But I also feel it necessary to pay homage to my hair.  To say thank you hair – for being one of my favorite features.  Thanks for helping me define my style.  Thanks for keeping my ears warm in the winter months.  I will miss you.

Still debating whether or not to get a wig…  I think i’m drawn to it more as a way to keep my head warm than as a fashion statement or safety blanket.  And I have to admit I’m kind of excited to seriously rock all my scarves.

In other news…  The fabulous Auntie Cole has arrived!  This morning Miss M burst into Auntie Cole’s room singing, “Time to wake up!” and then proceeded to smother her with hugs and kisses – Even though when I asked Miss M for a hug 2 minutes earlier there were no hugs for me :-(

Auntie Cole escorted me to my chemo session today and had the honour of being the first person to meet my oncologist (who she was duly impressed and enamored with).  And it felt good to have my own opinion of him and intuition validated.

It was also nice to have my BFF there to hear the news about my recent MRI results…

It seems the PET scan and MRI both show that the suspicious areas in the bone marrow of my left femur bone are most likely cancerous.  My oncologist says he’s pretty certain about the results but if I need to know 110% that it is cancer we can always do a bone biopsy.  Personally, I’m not keen on going through one of those right about now so i’m going with his vibe that it’s unnecessary.

Having the cancer in my bones does not change my current chemo regime.  He said the chemo i’m taking now will fight those cancer cells too.  The only new thing will be a monthly medicine i’ll have to take along with my chemo to boost my bone strength.  He also told me to take it easy with weight bearing activities (ie. no running).  The fear is that the cancer can make my bones super brittle and they may eventually fracture (worst case scenario).

Honestly, i’m not too surprised about the results.  In my heart and gut I’ve felt from the start that my cancer had already spread to quite a few areas of my body and they always say tuition is bang on.  So if that’s the case, then my gut feeling about making it through this cancer and going on to live many many years will also become reality.

Thoughts create reality.  I continue to draw on the strength and support of those close to me and all those holding me in their thoughts and prayers.  Together we can make miracles happen.  I feel it.

Peace and love to all.  – T